Augury isn't Spelled O R G
by CrazyChick15
Summary: Harry and Ginny's Relationship...from Augury's and Pheonix's points of view...New Characters added.
1. Fawkes

**Augury isn't Spelled O – R – G**

**By Crazy Chick 15**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter! But if I did, this would be a _pretty_ funny book. winkwink R&R, Please!**

**Chapter 1: Fawkes**

**I think something's going on between Harry and Ginny; I mean, something already _was _going on, but…they're doing….some stuff. Other than just snogging, I mean. "Dear Holly, is 'Happiness' spelled, **

'**H – A – P – P –Y – N –E – S – S' ?" I ask my beautiful wife, Holly (You probably know her name already). My wife looks concerned. "Have you taken your spelling medication today, honey?" she asks. I look back at my day. "No, I believe not. But it won't work now, it wears off at exactly 7:00 pm, and it's 8:30." She shakes her head and starts reading some…knitting magazine from the new Headmistress , Minerva McGonagall (Albus Dumbledore died. Murdered by Snape…but Snape didn't want to do it). Anyway, I return to my crossword and try to figure out how to spell, 'Happy.' I'm a whiz at crosswords, but I can't spell without my medication. Once I figure it out and write it down, I'm too tired to continue. "I think it's time for bed," Holly must've noticed how tired I was. "Good night!" she said, and lay down to sleep. I must've dozed off, because I don't remember anything else. Oh, and I'll tell you about…Harry…and…G –G- Ginny…Later…**

**Dream Sequence**

**_Holly is having babies…but I know she doesn't want babies yet…and besides, she says I need my mojo back…but…what if she ch – ch –cheated on me! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!_**


	2. Holly

Augury isn't Spelled O – R – G

**By Crazy Chick 15**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter! But if I did, this would be a _pretty_ funny book. winkwink R&R, Please!**

**Chapter 1: Fawkes**

**I think something's going on between Harry and Ginny; I mean, something already _was _going on, but…they're doing….some stuff. Other than just snogging, I mean. "Dear Holly, is 'Happiness' spelled, **

'**H – A – P – P –Y – N –E – S – S' ?" I ask my beautiful wife, Holly (You probably know her name already). My wife looks concerned. "Have you taken your spelling medication today, honey?" she asks. I look back at my day. "No, I believe not. But it won't work now, it wears off at exactly 7:00 pm, and it's 8:30." She shakes her head and starts reading some…knitting magazine from the new Headmistress , Minerva McGonagall (Albus Dumbledore died. Murdered by Snape…but Snape didn't want to do it). Anyway, I return to my crossword and try to figure out how to spell, 'Happy.' I'm a whiz at crosswords, but I can't spell without my medication. Once I figure it out and write it down, I'm too tired to continue. "I think it's time for bed," Holly must've noticed how tired I was. "Good night!" she said, and lay down to sleep. I must've dozed off, because I don't remember anything else. Oh, and I'll tell you about…Harry…and…G –G- Ginny…Later…**

**Dream Sequence**

Holly is having babies…but I know she doesn't want babies yet…and besides, she says I need my mojo back…but…what if she ch – ch –cheated on me! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Chapter 2: Holly

Well, my husband Fawkes has died…he's rebirthing now, as I speak. He's so cute, but I have to take care of him, for when he really does die, he'll be ready to say good - bye. But that is not this year. Nor is next. Anyway, I have to take care of him like he takes care of me when I die…and rebirth. Ugh. I'm sorry, but Fawkes looks quite ugly when he's old, when he dies, and when he's reborn. No, not ugly, horrific. No offense, but he is. It's not…pretty. Anyway, it's the same thing with me; when I die he says I'm quite pretty when I die, but I know he's lying. Sigh I wish he would be happy with the way I am. I'm happy with him, so…hmmm…I wish I could say something more interesting other than, "Oui je sais le français il est difficile de croire mais si vous pourriez entendre que je que je retentirais français, mais parlez en anglais, comme Fleur Delacour. J'avais l'habitude d'être Madame Maxime's, mais elle m'a donné à Dumbledore avant qu'il soit mort. Bien, je suis fatigué et il est tard, ainsi... bonne nuit!" (Translation: "Yes I know French it's hard to believe but if you could hear me I would sound French, but speak in English, like Fleur Delacour. I used to be Madam Maxime's, but she gave me to Dumbledore before he died. Well, I'm tired and it's late, so...good night!")

Dream Sequence

I am having babies…but Fawkes knows I don't want babies yet…and besides, I says he needs his mojo back…but…what if I ch – ch –cheated on him!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!


	3. Audrey

**Augurey isn't Spelled O – R – G**

**By Crazy Chick 15**

**Chapter 3: Audrey**

**Hi. You may not know me, but I'm Audrey. Just Audrey. I'm Parvati Patil's Augurey, she got me for Christmas from Dumbledore. Anyway, Parvati named me Audrey because it sounds like Augury. Yeah, I know, it's STUPID, but…Parvati's got it going on…but only with fashion and makeup sense. Not very smart. Pretty, though. Actually, she's smart, but when she talks to me, you'd think I was a human baby. So, that's Parvati. Oh and her friend Lavender is cool. In fact, she gave me a little storybook about Dumbledore. Oh, goodness, I miss him so. Anyway, it's really cool; it has a miniature portrait of him and I can talk to him when I want to. He talks to me back. I really miss him, and I think the world would come to an end before I stopped missing him. BUT: I know something you don't! No really, I do. Just don't tell anyone: Dumbledore is still alive! Yeah, it's true, but weird. Now remember don't tell a soul! Uh – Oh, Parvati's coming!**

**"Hey, Audrey, what's new? Are you feeling better from that wee littew cold?" Ugh. Parvati talk. Gotta go throw up now. Bye.**

**BLERGGH!**


	4. Dumbledore

**Augurey isn't Spelled O – R – G**

**By Crazy Chick 15**

**Chapter 4: Dumbledore**

**The wind makes me shiver. I hold my cloak tight, as I get ready to apparate. Oh, yes, I am Albus Dumbledore, whom everyone thinks I am dead. But, fear not! I am not dead, just hiding. Watching the war. The war raging in the wizarding world. The war that's seeping into the muggle world. Scary, isn't it? Not really scary, I'd say…frightening. Right? Yes, well then, I will be there in a minute – CRACK - Ah, back at Hogsmeade. I watch Madam Rosemerta closing The Three Broomsticks. I watch Honeydukes close for what may be the eternal war. I watch the saddened children from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry just walk away. Then I see just the three I wanted to see: Harry Potter, Hermione Granger, and Ronald Weasley. They're laughing, happy, yet sad. I hear Harry say, "You know, Hermione's getting married…NOT!" Ron erupts in laughter. Hermione, giggling, says, "I would love to get married, Ron, Harry, but under the _circumstances_…" Yes, Voldemort murdered Hermione's parents himself, Hermione watching from the panic room. Whoops, I step on a thick twig and it cracks. What a nasty sound. "Hold on," Harry pulls out his wand. Oh, how Harry will be surprised, ha. Wands out, they turn the corner and see…me. Hermione faints, Ron squeaks, Harry's eyes grow wide. He grins. Oof Harry runs at me and hugs me. I chuckle. How lovely. I hand Harry, Ron, and Hermione three timeturners. They just stare (Hermione has woken up, of course.). I wink, then apparate. When I reach my destination, I smile. My, it is good to be home. It is. Really. I lay down on a soft, comfortable bed, and I sleep.**

**SNORE**


	5. Fawkes Again

Augurey isn't Spelled O – R – G

**By Crazy Chick 15**

**Chapter 5: Fawkes Again**

**REJOICE! Voldemort has been defeated! We just heard (from Hedwig) that Harry Potter has won the war between good and evil! I just hope it'll be peaceful, Dumbledore is alive, my nightmares are gone, and I no longer need reading pills – never mind. But I was on a roll! Heh. Oh well. We'll need plenty of drinks from The Three Broomsticks, because…it's party time! Heh. Anyway, Holly has great news!**


	6. Holly Again

**Augury isn't Spelled O - R - G**

**By Crazy Chick 15**

**Chapter 6: Holly Again**

**I have some juicy news! Harry & Ginny are getting married! So are Ron and Hermione! It's going to be a wonderful double wedding! Dumbledore is going as well! Well, I've got to turn in for the night! Good – Bye!**

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Well, I hop you liked it. I'm going to make a sequel to it, about 6 months after the double wedding.**


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